How To Stop An Elderly Parent From Driving
As we get older, we can start to struggle with some of the things we once found so easy. Driving is an obvious example, and even though there are over 18 million seniors driving on the roads and plenty of them are perfectly capable of operating their vehicles effectively, there’s also a large percentage that should probably think about hanging up the car keys and opting for other modes of transportation.
There are various reasons why older people might struggle with driving. Their reaction times might not be quite as speedy as they once were, for example, making it tougher to break in time or react to hazards on the roads, or their eyesight might have gotten worse, making it harder to read road signs and keep up with what’s around them.
This is a natural part of life’s progression, but it can be difficult for many older folks to accept, and a lot of people start to worry about their parents or other elderly friends and relatives who insist on driving, despite showing some signs that they might not be up to it anymore. So, what are you supposed to do in this situation, especially if your elderly relative is a little stubborn or sensitive? Well, here are some top tips for dealing with this difficult situation.
Ride Along With Them
A good way to start off dealing with a challenged older driver is to ride along with them as a passenger and actually see how they drive. You might find that you were underestimating their abilities, in which case you don’t have anything to worry about, or you might discover that their driving is even worse than you feared.
Either way, riding along with them will allow you to develop a better understanding of their driving abilities, and it’s even wise to make some notes afterward and try to identify problematic aspects of their conduct on the roads that you’ll be able to use later on if you choose to sit down and have a discussion with them.
Talk It Out
This leads on from the previous point. Once you know that your elderly parent is struggling with driving, perhaps being a little too heavy on the accelerator, struggling to park effectively, or missing turns on a regular basis, it’s time to sit down and talk it out with them. This can be tricky, depending on who you’re talking to, but if you can keep calm and walk the line between gentle and firm, you should be able to get your point across.
It might be tempting to be direct and take the keys from them or make up some kind of sneaky method to get the car out of their hands, but in most cases, elderly individuals will be much more appreciative and responsive to someone who respects them enough to talk to them face-to-face. Try to explain to your parent how much you care about them, as well as outlining the risks they face, with stats showing that 20 older people die in car accidents every single day in the US.
Suggest Other Options
It’s no good simply telling an old person that they shouldn’t be driving any more if you aren’t able to suggest an alternative. Just like younger people, many old folks rely on their cars to get around, visiting friends, seeing their families, going to their favorite spots, eating out at bars and restaurants, etc.
So, before you suggest that they hand over their keys, it’s a good idea to do some research ahead of time and try to formulate a plan for how they can get around without their car. Look for local bus routes they could use, or introduce them to ride-share apps like Uber and Lyft, showing them that their lives don’t need to change too drastically.
Conclusion
It can feel like quite a challenge to approach an older person you love and ask them to give up something that they’ve been doing for decades. They might get mad or frustrated, but try to stay calm in this situation and put yourself in their shoes for a moment, imagining how it might feel to be told that you’re too old to do something.
It’s never easy for anyone to hear, and this is why a lot of elderly parents might instantly get defensive when you bring up this subject. However, if you remain calm, offer some alternative options, and point out the possible risks your parents might be running if they continue to get behind the wheel, then hopefully they’ll be able to see you have their best interests at heart and make the right call.
